looking at a blank screen

Of course my computer screen wasn't blank as I stared at the contents of my ex-girlfriend's facebook homepage - my goddamn mind was blank. I fell in love a little over half-a-year ago, and now I'm stuck wallowing about every flirtacious post, comment, and the "I like" thumb that she leaves on her male friends' status updates. I'm enraged. She suppossed to be mine. MINE. Okay. Mercury is in retrograde. Let me calm my young azz down.

My girlfriend is 36, I'mmm 25. Besides our age difference we are both of different cultures. She's Irish-American, Catholic, though not religious. I'm Russian. One-and-a-half generation immigrant. Vith may thikk Russhian akcent.

Here's what I found helps when you're in a relationship with an older woman (she's not a cougar, btw, and she'll bite your head off if she hears you call her that). Be responsible for your half of the partnership, and allow her to be responsible for her half. In his book The Mastery Of Love, Don Miguel Ruiz brings an example of a dog: when you come home, your dog is happy to see you. He runs up to the door to greet you. He wags his tail. He barks in happiness. The dog is responsible for his part of the relationship. In turn, you love the dog, feed it, take it outside for windy walks, cuddle with it (if you fancy), and play with it. The dog needs nothing more from you than for you to be a responsible owner. The same logic can be applied to relationships - any relationship, in fact - to your grandmother, coworkers, friends, etc. Be responsible for your half. This will ease the tension and stress that may arise when you try to be responsible for your lover (hee hee).

I tried and it worked for me. Does it work full-proof 110% of the time. It does. As long as your ego doesn't get in the way.

Ways to curbing your ego, look up quotes from Eckhart Tolle, or, his books - The New Earth and The Power of Now.

The Mastery of Love, by Don Miguel Ruiz can be read in one weekend, for free, at your local barnes&nobles. Also check out The Four Agreements.

Salut.